A history teacher & his wife were sitting at a table. The wife asked. ‘Anything new at work?’ He replied, ‘No, I’m teaching History.’
 

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Q: What’s the diff between mother & wife? A: One woman brings into the world crying & the other ensures you continue to do so.
 



When I go wrong, I need ur hand 2 correct, wen emotions bust out, I need ur hand 2 catch, wen I win, I need ur hand 2 pat. In short:Ye Haath Mujhe De De Thakur
 



Today is the International day of Smart & Attractive people. Send this to someone who fits the description! Don’t send it back; I’ve already received hundreds.
 



So Sweet is ur SMILE, So Sweet is ur STYLE, So Sweet is ur VOICE, So Sweet is ur EYE, see …….how Sweetly I Lie.
 



The Madrasi said: I want to see the movie ‘Heart is umbrella’. Which movie did he really want to see? Dil Chhata Hai…….
 



Geeta Sar: SMS kar aur bhool ja, reply ki apeksha mat rakh, kiya hua SMS kabhi veyarth nahi jaata, Sabko apne kiye hue SMS ka reply milta hi hai!
 



Just close ur eyes and think of urself for 10 seconds…… Open ur eyes ! Now you will realize that u have wasted 10 seconds in thinking of a fool.
 



God made Pepsi, God made whisky, God made me so sexy, God made rivers, God made lakes and God made you… well everybody makes mistakes.
 



I saw u on road today. U were lukin so fine, ur face so divine, ur walk so perfect. My heart started singing a sweet song: Who Let The Dog Out!
 



When words fail… eyes work, when eyes fail… heart works, and when heart fails… to kya?, samajh le TAPAK gaya ‘MAAMU’
 



The Japanese have produced a camera that has such a fast shutter speed it can take a picture of a woman with her mouth shut!
 



Geet Ka Saar: SMS woh gyaan hai jo baantne se badta hai, isiliye he praani tu bill ka moh tyag de aur SMS kar, isi se tera manushaya janm safal hoga.
 



Agar zindagi main kuch kar dikhana hai to kuch aisa karo ki jis shaher, jis gali, jis mod se gujro wahan ke har ghar se awaaz aaye, Papa aa gaye, Papa aa gaye!
 



Tum sada haste raho, sada muskurate raho, khush raho, gun-gunate raho, hamesha mast raho. Mera kya hai, log tumhe hi PAGAL kahenge!
 



May the fleas of thousand camels infest the crotch of the person who screws up your day and may their arms be too short to scratch.
 





 Teacher: Four beautiful girls are walking on the road. Change it to exclamatory sentence. Student: WOW !