How do u know when kids start to grow up? Gals grow up when they start to put lipstick n boys grow up when they start to wipe it off!
 

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Mom: Tujhe ladka pasand aaya ho to baat agey chalayen. Girl: Ladka to theek hai but mota hai. Mom: TV chahe 14? ka ho ya 29? ka remote 6? ka hi hota hai.
 



A baby fish asked her mother: Y can’t we live on earth? Mother Fish: Earth is not the place for FISH, it’s made for SELFISH.
 



Fill in the blank with yes or NO only. _______I M NOT A Male. Koi jaldi nahin hai, aaram se soch kar bata dena.
 



Paani mein Whiskey milao ta nasha chadta hai. Paani mein Rum milao to nasha chadta hai. Paani mein Brandy milao to nasha chadta hai. Saala paani mein hi kuch gadbad hai.
 



Basanti: Bhaag Dhanno bhag, aaj teri Basanti ki izzat ka sawal hai. Dhanno: Tujhe apni padi hai. Meri soch jiske peeche Gabbar ke 10 ghode pade hain
 



Mon to Sun, From Jan To Dec, From birth till my death, my feelings 4 u have never changed. For me, you’ve always been a headache!
 



In chemistry class teacher asked a gal: what r Nitrates Gal answered shyly: night rates, they r costlier than day.
 



Woman has man in it, Mrs has Mr in it, female has male in it, Madam has adam in it, so girls r always incomplete without boys.
 



Namashkar, yeh hamari faltoo SMS seva hai, is mein hum logon ko waqt-bewaqt tang karte hain. Is seva ka labh uthane ke liye shukriya, ab aap apna kaam kariye.
 



I have started luving ‘U’… I know it sounds rediculous but I can’t control my feelings 4 ‘U’. Some time later I’ll start luving more ALPHABETS…!
 



Ramchandra kah gaye siya se, aisa kalyug aayega, sifr ek dost SMS karega, dusara kamina bas padh ke muskurayega!
 



Sharab Ek Bimari hai jo saare samaj ko khatam kar rahi hai. To aao milkar is bimari ko khatam karen. Ek bottle tum khatam karo ek bottle hum khatam karen.
 



Can’t believe after all the shit they have been through they’re still together…………Who? Your bum cheeks!!
 



Tum Haste Raho, Haste Raho, Haste Raho, Haste Raho, Muskarate Raho, Sada Khilkhilate Raho, Khush Raho, Mera Kya hain Log Tumhe hi Paagal kahenge! Ha ha ha!
 



SMS ka sangrah karke kya paayega vats…? Balance ka moh tyag aur sms kar… Mitron se sampark banaye rakhne se hi moksha ki prapti hogi… Swami Messageanand.
 






I think I should tell you what people are saying behind your back.……. Nice Ass!!!