I’ve written a poem for you: Twinkle twinkle little star, you should know what you are, and once you know what you are, Mental hospital is not so far.
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What’s the difference between pleasure and torture? Pleasure is thinking of you & torture is thinking of you too much.
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Banta: How does an attorney sleep? Santa: First he lies on one side, and then he lies on the other.
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Every organisation is like a tree full of monkeys. Ones at the top can only see monkeys below them and ones at the bottom see only assholes above them.
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I hate it when people point to their wrists to ask for the time! I mean, seriously, do I point to my crotch when I need to go to a Restroom?
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A reasent studdi haz shon dat peepal hoo aar vary samaart end gud lukeeng maik manee spallings meestaikes… vaat ees yorr opeeniun?
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Hi! Need one girl to marry… Age no bar, color no bar, height no bar, caste no bar, but girl’s father must have his own bar…CHEERS
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I read on the newspaper that sending text messages causes a radiation that is cancerous. That’s why I have decided to stop – to stop reading newspapers.
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Why do I miss you? Because you make me smile. You are so kind. You are so sweet. You are very funny. And most of all, because you are not texting me any more. That’s why.
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When you are in love, you wish you were married. When you are married, you wish you were in love.
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The rain makes all things beautiful, the grass and flowers too. But if rain really makes all things beautiful, why doesn’t it rain on you?
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Whenever I hear people say something bad about you, like when they say that you are not cute enough, I would always come to your defense and say “She’s trying to be one naman a!”
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I hate blackout. Never mind the aircon, never mind TV and stereo, never mind the internet. But if I could not recharge my cell phone so I could keep texting, that’s another point. I hate blackout.
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Every time I hold her hand, I feel like holding my cheek. She always slaps me on the face.
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The only people whom I greet “Good morning” are those who are smart, cute and malakas ang sex appeal. So, pano ba yan? E di good afternoon na lang sayo!
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“Learn to appreciate art,” I told my girlfriend. She said, “How could I appreciate you, then?”
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You’ve got sex appeal, you’ve got style, you’ve got intelligence, and you’ve got class. You’ve got the face and you’ve got the body but I’ve got the wrong number… Sorry ha, mali pala!